So, here it is, the weekend, and I am not doing anything that I thought I would be doing. All week I had been anticipating this time of discernment and decision-making. I thought that these two days would be my time of reflection, contemplation and choice. I thought this because I was told to think this.
Let me explain. For the past six weeks, I have been in an interview process for a new position at my company. With the final interview completed, I was guaranteed a pronouncement by Friday. My intention was, if offered the position, to take this weekend and choose between acceptance and refusal.
But alas, here I am, Saturday afternoon and still unaware of the company’s decision. Not only was nothing declared, no mention was made of the issue whatsoever. Once again, I was promised action, but left with waiting.
I am so sick of the entire waiting process! Why can life never go as planned? So much of my adulthood has been spent waiting for something else to happen or some decision to be made and, frankly, I demand results! I want to run ahead of everyone and get things done. I want to act now and hope that God will bless my actions later. If God has a problem with a decision that I make, He will stop me, right? So why not press on…make decisions, take steps forward, do…something.
“But they soon forgot what he had done and did not wait for his counsel. In the desert they gave in to their craving; in the wasteland they put God to the test.” - NIV
The Bible is full of examples from people who did not wait on the Lord. Incidentally, not one of those examples ends positively. It is so hard to control our urge to run forward. At times, a negative result seems more appealing than no result at all.
During times like this, when action is tempting, part of me wonders: Is the duty of Jesus to lead us or stop us?