Today, I am just tired. I am tired from work. I am tired from all the tennis I have been playing. I am tired from being so frustrated at projects that don’t seem to be going my way. But, more so than my exhaustion, I am feeling like I am one step away from being completely beaten in more than one area of my life. I realize that this doesn’t make much sense, and my casual vagueness IS intentional, but I am sure that you can read between the lines. Plain and simple, all month I have been towing the line between success and disappointment.
Throughout the course of my life I feel like I have been on board with trusting God in the big decisions. I trust Him with my salvation, I trust Him with my marriage and I trust Him with my spiritual development. Where I tend to falter, and often, is in the smaller things…the everyday things.
At some point during this walk of faith that we are all on, does there not come a point when we must learn to detach from the things that so greatly concern us and case them wholly on God? Must we stop thinking of ourselves as the source of deliverance in a difficult situation and realize that it is not even up to us to be successful?
“Do you still have no faith?” – NIV
When we pray and ask for God’s will to be done in any situation, do we always believe that His will is good, or, that He is able to accomplish it? I have learned that any asking that maintains an internal sense of panic is not derived from a genuine trust. This anxiety secretly reveals a hidden belief that we are perhaps more critical to the situation than God is. This mistrust only leads to fatigue.
To trust is to rest, and the heart that is calm has learned that Jesus is above the storm all together.