Lately, these last couple months specifically, I have found myself becoming increasingly negative. Somewhere along the line I made the conscious decision that, in any given situation, I would rather be surprised and shocked by a positive outcome than be surprised and shocked for a negative one. The way I see it, if something does not go as planned and ends up in ruin, I would fare far better if I had seen it coming all the while.
Regrettably, this mentality has managed to morph itself into almost all aspects of my daily life, thus making my general disposition one of doubt and skepticism. I have been expecting the worst features in my coworkers to always appear. I have been preparing for harsh criticism for anything that I put out. And, most of all, I haven't been expecting much from life in general.
Living in a world of doubt is embarrassingly lonely. You don't always want to be the voice of negativity, so you say nothing. You don't always want to be a buzz kill, so you fester in remote solitude. And trust me, when you are hesitant to expect anything good, God will never seem farther away.
My thought for the day is that...finally...I am waking up. These things in my life that go horribly wrong, will the outcome be different if I am well prepared for the disappointment?...I think not.
Is the joy that comes with expecting the best worth forfeiting for the temporary shock that accompanies the worst?