Saturday, April 3, 2010

Beautiful Burdens


Today was a great day. The weather was beautiful, the temperature was just right and the Easter weekend sales were insane! My mom and I hit all the local shopping spots while my dad, brother and husband rebuilt the dock leading from our lake house to the water. Even my Chihuahua was able to enjoy some outside time today and, hopefully, shed some of that holiday weight he has been toting around since 2009.

Yes, today was great, but all the while, in the back of my head, I couldn’t shake the fact that I had not yet written my daily blog. I knew that posting a blog daily was something that I had committed to doing earlier this year, how could I have deferred it?

To be perfectly honest, this blog has been a little overwhelming lately. Only 80 days in, and I am already feeling the weight of 285 more posts. In an effort to be fully transparent, just seeing the number 285 typed out sends me into premature cardiac arrest.

Somehow, over the last few weeks, the emotions of this project have morphed into something I did not expect: Obligation. I feel like I made a pledge to the Lord, and for this commitment alone, I must continue.

I have to wonder, is the best reason to serve our Father…because we said we would? Should we not fall at His feet out of perfect freedom and desire? Out of love and surrender? Should we love Him, not out of spiritual duty, but simply because He has first loved us?

1 John 4:19
“We love because He first loved us.” - NIV

How easy it becomes to forget why we are serving when the work is more visible than the reward. When all we can see is the effort put forth, our blessing slowly becomes a burden. “I don’t want to write today.” “I should never have committed to this much time.” “What was I thinking?”

I’ll tell you what I was thinking: I was thinking how much God loves me. I was thinking how much effort He put forth to save me. I was thinking that the thirty minutes I spend in obedience, would never outweigh the time I waste in sin.

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